Ever feel like everything just sort of happens all at once?
Like, you learn all kinds of things about yourself and you meet new kinds of people and you try to understand things apart from the way you were brought up and you’re just trying to make your own decisions and stuff and then sometimes something and maybe even someone can make your reevaluate everything again but while all of this is going on you’ve got, like, stacks of unpaid bills and the student loan people are calling and you really just want to take a nap but your room is frat-boy filthy and you’re pretty sure you’ve got a mold situation somewhere because you can’t breathe through your nose but you’re all “Whatever, it’s fine. Today is a new day where not a single fuck will be given about anything” but you really shouldn’t think like that because you’re nearly twenty-five which is adult-ish or at least adult-adjacent and you still need to bum gas money off of people so maybe you should get your act together but you don’t know where to go first so you get in your near gas-less car and head to Starbucks which really isn’t even the coffee you want but the Dunkin’ Donuts coffee girl nows you by heart plus you feel smarter with Starbucks because, for whatever reason, it makes you feel like you’d have no problem listening to NPR on a Saturday morning inside your cozy apartment while a steady rain falls outside even though you’d really rather be Facebooking and catching up on Jersey Shore but no one can’t tell you’re faking your snobbery because you’ve got your Starbucks and your reduced fat coffeecake which seems like a good idea because of the whole reduced thing but really it’s just less awful than eating the whole cake which you could do because your life may or may not be in shambles?
Okay. I have a good job with a great boss and I have some really great friends, both near and far, and I’m living rent- free (which doesn’t mean judgment- free, just to clarify) and I’m grateful for all of that. But I feel like to get the things I’ve never had before and have always wanted, I have to do things I’ve never done. And lately– yeah– lately, I’ve been doing just that. Jury’s still out on this whole KP vs The World: Grab The Bull’s Balls attitude I’ve got going here. But, look! It’s making me write here again. Albeit a bit cryptic and mostly spastic. But if you thought about coming back to read this update, then you knew what you could be walking into. So joke’s on you there, pal.
I think there’s a lot of freedom to be had and the ways I’m going about taking advantage of it are all new and wonderful and I like it but it scares me a little too. But it’s a good scared. It’s a “No Regrets” scared. It’s a “Yeah, I Said It. Now What?” scared.
Look, I don’t know what that means. Could you pass the half and half?
